Dealing with Headwinds

Black-and-white photograph of dark storm clouds gathering over a rough sea.

A dramatic black-and-white photograph of dark storm clouds gathering over a restless sea, with waves stretching toward the horizon.

The episode of the headwind—which Jesus does not spare his disciples—shows that fulfillment is not the result of our own project, the realization of our own plan, or a persistent attempt to do better, but the grace of a presence.
— Simone Riva
Simone Riva Dealing with Headwinds.

Simone Riva - We do not decide when God’s grace will come. Christ knows when it is time for the multiplication of the loaves and when it is time for headwinds

The disciples might gladly have stayed there, enjoying food multiplied for everyone and accepting thanks for a work that was not their own. But "Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd" (Mt 14:22).

The Lord keeps for himself the moment of parting from those who have eaten their fill. He must have wanted to turn his gaze on those men and women, weighed down with questions and needs, and to wait for the day when the bread they had just eaten would no longer be enough, no longer satisfy them.

It sends shivers down my spine to think of the intensity in Christ's eyes as he contemplated the destiny of every single person he met. There was no room for rebuke or exhortation, not one step taken at the expense of others' freedom to discover their own human path. Utter solitude. The others do not understand; even the ones he has chosen do not understand—so much so that they would have settled for the multiplied loaves and fish, the five thousand men, and the twelve baskets of leftovers.

But Jesus knows there is something else to reckon with: the headwind. There, and only there, the apostles could finally verify what they had just seen with their own eyes. And so a strange thing happens, which the Gospel makes a point of recording: "Meanwhile, the boat was already many miles from land and was being tossed by the waves; for the wind was against them" (Mt 14:24).

Without going that whole distance—and without their own utter helplessness—how could the reality of Christ's compassion for every human being have taken root in them? They would have been order-takers, bureaucrats, hired hands for someone in power; instead, history would find itself face-to-face with witnesses.

The headwind, the fear of seeing Jesus walking on the water, the agitation of a sea that will not settle, the suspicion that they are lost, the realization that they cannot imitate the Master—all of it finally breaks from Peter's lips in the cry that Jesus' gaze had silently begged for the day before, as he dismissed the crowds: "Lord, save me!" (Mt 14:30).

We know full well that it can take a lifetime to arrive at that plea. For it to be genuine—not merely formal, but radical, visceral—it takes a self-awareness that is more gift than achievement. And the path where grace prefers to meet us is the path of our most authentic desire—the one we cannot shake even when we run for cover in a thousand distractions and dodges—the desire for our own fulfillment.

The episode of the headwind, which Jesus does not spare his disciples, shows that fulfillment is not the outcome of a project of our own, the carrying out of our own plan, or a dogged attempt to do better, but the grace of a presence: "Immediately Jesus reached out his hand, caught him, and said, 'You of little faith, why did you doubt?'" (Mt 14:31).

"Immediately" and "slowly" are God's adverbs. His patience does not get in the way of the immediacy of his presence and his help, just as his intervention does not erase the road still ahead. He knows when it is time for the multiplication of the loaves and fish and when it is time for the headwind. Not like a puppet master pulling strings, but like a craftsman no one can imitate, who reaches out his hand always to save us and set us back on our feet—knowing that we grow only by facing reality as it comes, not without doubts and fears, but filled with the certainty of the good that awaits us in every circumstance.

Simone Riva

Don Simone Riva, born in 1982, is an Italian Catholic priest ordained in 2008. He serves as parochial vicar in Monza and teaches religion. Influenced by experiences in Peru, Riva authors books, maintains an active social media presence, and participates in religious discussions. He's known for engaging youth and connecting faith with contemporary

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Beyond Fear